How Do You Solve A Problem Like The Buckster?

sung to the tune of "How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria" from The Sound of Music
Many a thing you know you'd like to tell him
Many a thing he ought to understand

But how do you make him stay
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?

Oh, how do you solve a problem like the Buckster?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?

When I'm with him I'm confused
Out of focus and bemused
And I never know exactly where I stand

Unpredictable as weather
He's as flighty as a feather
He's a darling! He's a demon! He's a lamb!

He'd outpester any pest
Drive a hornet from its nest
He could throw a whirling dervish out of whirl

He is gentle! He is wild!He's a riddle! He's a child!
He's a headache! He's an angel!

He's a DOGGGGG!!!! *

*Point taken from Barbara: this time around he merely inhabits a dog's skin.
Today's fragrance: Burberry Brit: spice, amber, almonds, vanilla.