my occasional musings on life, love, art, perfume ... what else is there?


One Crone's Perspective

Main Entry: crone Pronunciation: \ˈkrōn\ Function: noun Etymology: Middle English, a term of abuse, from Anglo-French caroine, charoine dead flesh — more at carrion Date: 14th century : a withered old woman Merriam-Webster Online

One of my favorite -- ok, my favorite -- bloggers used the term "crone" in a recent post and I want to understand why I have such a visceral negative reaction to that term.

It ranks right up there with "old lady perfume."

I think it's having a stereotype pushed up into one's face. It may not have been intended as a pejorative -- we need to own our own reactions -- but I am bristling.


Why am I so sensitive to the idea that I am a woman of a certain age? Because it's at such a variance with how I feel, how I look, what I do, who I am.

And this blog mention isn't the only place I'm finding my nerves vibrating on top of my skin at the idea that I'm getting old. And I'm a woman. So I am getting to be an old woman.

But, but ...

Being a 56 year old woman is nothing like I thought it would be.

It's more fun. More alive. I'm more free, and more sensual, better looking and smarter than I thought 56 year old women were. More than I was at 26.

Maybe my emotional reactivity needs to catch up with my reality. Actually understanding that living well is the best revenge against age and inevitability.

I intend to bring new meaning to "Live hard. Die (young). Leave a beautiful corpse." Two out of three won't be bad.


Blogger Doug said...

Ah, well, um, you see I think of crones as, like doddering old men, liberated to lives of the mind and a whole new set of skills. I also see them as of an age roughly double your own. So, you're halfway to wisdom and in the prime of your sensuality, by my reckoning.

*backs toward door*

Now, a disparaging term you might be more suitably sensitive to would be "cougar."

*sprints the rest of the way*

1:33 PM

Blogger mireille said...

D, I didn't know you could move that fast. xoxo

2:03 PM

Blogger ariel said...

ROTFL! Good reply.

Live young and leave a beautiful corpse, that's like saying, I commend it to rain tomorrow. Quite silly. There are woman scared by their age, they make me scared for myself. Then there are women feeling good in their own skins, they make me smile. Thank you!

2:56 PM

Blogger ariel said...

*Die young

2:57 PM

Blogger Doug said...

Yeah, Mireille, sorry about the doorjamb. Ariel, not only is the attractive corpse as uncertain as tomorrow, but so is necrophilia.

6:17 AM

Blogger TLP said...

I don't like the "crone" word either. But many embrace it. There's a group of women at my church who give each other parties to celebrate becoming a "crone." They don't have an age or anything like that to decide when one becomes a crone. The woman decides for herself, and it's supposed to mean that she's wise, etc.

I've decided to die without becoming a crone. I figure just a grumpy old bitch ought to be enough.

4:00 PM

Blogger mireille said...

lolololol, grumpy old bitch, lolololol. you're cute, Lucy. xoxo

7:50 PM

Blogger Bela said...

I'm with TLP there.

'It's more fun. More alive. I'm more free, and more sensual, better looking and smarter than I thought 56 year old women were. More than I was at 26.' I'm very glad it's like that for you, M. Unfortunately, it isn't for me - mostly because of what other people choose to see. Twenty-seven will remain my best age (I'm still that in my head).

8:19 AM


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