One Crone's Perspective
Main Entry: crone Pronunciation: \ˈkrōn\ Function: noun Etymology: Middle English, a term of abuse, from Anglo-French caroine, charoine dead flesh — more at carrion Date: 14th century : a withered old woman Merriam-Webster Online
One of my favorite -- ok, my favorite -- bloggers used the term "crone" in a recent post and I want to understand why I have such a visceral negative reaction to that term.
It ranks right up there with "old lady perfume."
I think it's having a stereotype pushed up into one's face. It may not have been intended as a pejorative -- we need to own our own reactions -- but I am bristling.
Why am I so sensitive to the idea that I am a woman of a certain age? Because it's at such a variance with how I feel, how I look, what I do, who I am.
And this blog mention isn't the only place I'm finding my nerves vibrating on top of my skin at the idea that I'm getting old. And I'm a woman. So I am getting to be an old woman.
But, but ...
Being a 56 year old woman is nothing like I thought it would be.
It's more fun. More alive. I'm more free, and more sensual, better looking and smarter than I thought 56 year old women were. More than I was at 26.
Maybe my emotional reactivity needs to catch up with my reality. Actually understanding that living well is the best revenge against age and inevitability.
I intend to bring new meaning to "Live hard. Die (young). Leave a beautiful corpse." Two out of three won't be bad.