The Male and Female Festivals
Have you ever noticed that the traditional Male Festival -- the Superbowl -- is closely followed by the traditional Female Festival -- Valentine's Day?
One festival requires chips, dip, submarine sandwiches and beer.
The other festival requires chocolate, flowers and perfume.
The main person behind the Male Festival is happy if you just sit there quietly, maybe cheering the right team on ... but not a lot is expected, really.
The main person behind the Female Festival, however, has been known to make the other person's life a living hell if Female Festival requirements are not forthcoming.
I find those differences interesting. Don't you?
posted by mireille at 8:31 PM
13 Comments:
Good points!
Well... with my gender confusion, I tend to do the male role for the Super Bowl, and a male/female hybrid role for Valentine's Day.
9:47 PM
so true!
6:16 AM
Wait, perfume? No wonder...
7:26 AM
I guess it depends on the male. Some expect their little women to play the role of housewife to the hilt, whipping up football-shaped meatloaves and pots of chili and making sure the beer doesn't run out. Thankfully, mine never did.
Hospital stats show that admissions of female patients for other-inflicted injuries (shootings, stabbings, bludgeonings, beatings, etc.) and "accidents" (e.g., falling down stairs) rise above statistically expected levels during Big Game Days -- but only in those regions associated with the WINNING team. Men whose team has lost may sulk and be cranky but don't experience the vicarious rise in testosterone (and yes, this has been demonstrated experimentally in reaction to viewing sports, but again, only when one's team wins) associated with the action-before-contemplation mindset and sense of entitlement that tend to predict violent behavior. Isn't that depressing?
Incidentally, DH is torn this year. He usually supports the older, more established team, but since former Packers coach Mike Holmgren is now with Seattle, he may lean that way instead. So he wins either way! (Which, er, means I lose...? Nah -- the guy's never touched me in a less-than-affectionate way, but he CAN produce a mean sulk, so I'm glad he's not closely identified with either team.)
9:03 AM
Aral, you're not confused, you're you.
hnp, I love it when people agree with me.
doug, YES, PERFUME.
K, there are no football shaped meatloafs here -- although I'm going to make the Buffalo Wings dip from the MUA member. And ever since the Patriots fell away, there's been a real fall-off in fervor. And tell G that the Hawks need all the support they can get ... the Steelers look mean.
xoxo
9:17 AM
LOL! Never thought about it. My dh requires *nothing* from me re: the Superbowl. Not even that I know who is playing, much less that I watch. On the other hand, I usually order myself a bottle of perfume for Valentine's Day and let him give it to me, so I guess we are even.
9:57 AM
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11:25 AM
I am eternally grateful my husband is not a really "sporty" kind of guy. We both dig Valentine's Day more since it is as good excuse as any to buy the GOOD champagne. This is the kind of shallow people we are ;)
11:26 AM
I just jumped on here to post something very close to what winterwheat said, only a lot less academically worded.
I do have another friend who believes the superbowl was moved closer to Valentine's Day so that men can combine their "I'm sorry for beating you up, babe" gift with their V-day gift and not have to pay twice.
We pay very little attention to pro sports in my house, a fact for which I'm grateful, although we do have a superbowl party to attend. Hopefully the commercials will be good.
12:46 PM
Mr. Logo and I both suffer from gender role confusion, I guess.
He is not much of a football fan and I am happy with mere token acknowledgement on V day.
This year, since it IS the 'Hawks we will be watching with friends.
9:45 PM
Feminine-identified women who buy into the role they've been alloted in my country, and probably the rest of the soccer obsessing world, have a longer time to suffer in this way. There are two cup finals every year, world cup and European championship once each in a four year cycle, plus the chance your husband supports a successful team they get into a series of European competitions.
It can be a nightmare, especially when the three-times-a-night episodes of Coronation Street that are only repeated twenty two times in a week and analysed endlessly in so-called "TV Guides" get moved around the broadcast schedule.
I know very few people who fulfill this stereotype. I see the propogation of this stereotype everywhere and it drives me mad. The only person I know who values soap operas over football and expresses annoyance at sporting inclusion on the tv is a gay man, but apparently since I have a uterus I feel this way too. Grr. I just feel so misrepresented by the media. No news there.
I don't know about soccer related spousal violence statistics over here. Winning is more dangerous than losing, hmm? Interesting. Still, we can blame it on cavemen behaviour and learn to accept it as normal and natural.
I'm not sure what I was trying to say here. Sorry for rambling.
jemima
5:22 AM
M- Don't move to Japan. Valentine's day is a day for the men. Women don't get flowers, parfume, OR chocolate. (The scandle!) Women buy chocolate for all the men they know (at the office, at the club, etc.). These are called "giri choco", or obligation chocolates, since they are obligated to sooth the egos of their coworkers with chocolates. Then, if they're really lucky, come White day, a guy who's sweet on her will buy here some marshmallows or maybe something a little more naughty. Japanese women who date foreigners milk this holiday duality for all it's worth. They want chocolates for Valentine's day AND White day.
11:02 PM
This is a great post! I didn't see it when I came yesterday. I'm eternally grateful that neither Ron nor I gets worked up about either celebration. Of course its just a continous lovefest around my house :-)
2:40 PM
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