my occasional musings on life, love, art, perfume ... what else is there?

6.20.2006

Seattle is home to Utilikilts, one of the only -- if not the only -- kilt manufacturer in the greater Pacific Northwest.

I think they're nifty, and feel that the world could only be improved by increased kilt wearage by the brawny sex. I mean males.

So, in a spirit of helpfulness, I bring you Utilikilt's Top Ten Reasons for Wearing a Kilt:

"1) Because throughout history, men have worn un-bifurcated garments.
2) Because if women had an appendage hanging between their legs, we guarantee you they wouldn’t be wearing pants.
3) Freedom, and increased mobility.
4) You only go around once, so why shouldn’t you be as comfortable as possible?
5) All men deserve air conditioning in the summer. You will chafe no more.
6) No more adjust, right side, left side… Say goodbye to wedgies.
7) A word about the pockets: Unlike pants, the Utilikilt’s pockets are only sewn down on top, so that they move with the garment but not with your leg. No more bulky crap contorting the shape of your leg. The Workman can carry an entire six pack.

8) You don’t have to wear your cell phone on your belt. With the Workman kilt, you don’t need a tool belt (for lighter stuff.)
9) The Utilikilt is made in the USA. You are supporting local industry. Your mojo will thank you.

10) Easy access ...

Fringe benefits:
A. Physical: Your virility may increase. You will experience the pleasing sensation of air conditioning.

B. Mental: Wearing a kilt shows a sense of security with yourself, and you will inspire much debate in others.
C. Spiritual: Without physical constrictions, your burden will be lighter, your sense of freedom less impaired, and your sense of yourself, will have room to grow."

Reading this wisdom from Utilikits, I think we can all agree ... these are words to get comfortable with. Go ahead. Get one. We'll all be happier.

5 Comments:

Blogger Doug said...

Oh, good grief!

5:58 PM

 
Blogger Doug said...

That is pretty funny advertizing, though.

5:59 PM

 
Blogger katiedid said...

Heh. I just love the way "un-bifurcated garments" sounds when I say it outloud.

7:32 PM

 
Blogger Logophile said...

Mr Logo has considered these,
but isn't quite ready to take the plunge.

But, Mirielle, go back to Dog's Life and tell him to shave, I beg of you! He is convinced his new facial hair is attractive to someone.

10:37 PM

 
Blogger WinterWheat said...

That's a hoot! I think all of their reasons are sound. Too bad we live in a culture where men get their butts kicked for seeming too feminine.

I love the "room to grow" innuendo at the end. :-)

6:03 AM

 

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